They did not kidnap and rape anyone important.
Comment by Linda E. Edwards
There is a shady gray area where the minds of many men seem to “lurk”. It is the area of “rough sex”, “stealing a piece(tiefing)”, “she asking for trouble”, and “she like it so”. This gray area of fantasy sends men to watch movies that women, sensible women, would not be caught dead watching. It sends them to “gentlemen’s clubs” – titty bars and “cat houses” to see acts of sex, real and simulated, that their wives would not perform for fear that their husbands beat the daylights out of them. “Wey she learn that from? I ent teach she dat”. Men still make clear distinctions about women and sex.
This gray area, that belongs really in the dark ages when women all went to their marriages innocent and virginal, to be raped on the wedding night by a man in a hurry to enjoy what he had long been denied; until he paid up with ring and ceremony, can perhaps explain the state’s failure to implement the Sexual Offenders Act. The implementation and enforcement lies in the hands of men too powerful to be raped, because they have outgrown their appeal to sex predators who prey on childlike males; and they are not females, placed in vulnerable positions daily by the need to leave their houses to earn a living, or to be home alone while their husbands work.
Women are hardly raped at home who have a maid, a gardener and a security guard. Women are hardly raped at work, who are the managers of large companies. It is the vulnerable, the weak, the one last in line on the trail, that are picked off by sex predators.
It really boils down to the value we place on women, on poor women in particular. If Pixie Lakhan had a father who drove taxi, who could have picked her up at school and dropped her home, she would have been safer. All girls are safer in their father’s cars.
If Sade Dipnarine was living in one of those houses in back of Federation Park with eight foot high walls and barred gates that passers by cannot even see through, she would have been safe. Alas, they were poor, and they died for it. And there are laws on the books that allow people like their predators to escape.
Why could not that suspected rapist been shackled to his bed, and to a long metal bar and chain when he went to the restroom? Would this be how he would have been handled if his victim was Dr. Jean Ramjohn Richards, wife of the president? You already know the answer.
So it is the distinction made between the victims of crime that allow laws like the sexual offenders act to be ignored. We need to treat each victim of a sexual offence as if she was the daughter of President Max Richards. And while I have your attention, let me make one further point. Police officers are forever suing the PSC, and thus the state, for failure to promote. They take an exam, they score well and nothing happens. They sue. What if every promotion was to be based in the future on their proactive stance on new legislation designed to protect women and children in a predatory society? What if they had to demonstrate, on an annual evaluation, their knowledge of these new laws, and what they had done to show support for them, both at the level of their department or station, and individually? Then, we may get something done. At least all hell would break loose. Compared to stagnation, that would be something. Further, what if every constituency in our electorate held its representative’s feet to the fire in terms of implementing specific laws that have already been adopted, but ignored? Every representative should be required to report to his/her constitutents, not on what we did as government or opposition, but also on what I did. This is not to include pounding the table, putting feet up on chairs, walking out or yelling “resign, resign,” but really doing the people’s business of representing them.
To raise women to the level of humans would require both thinking differently by men in power, and acting differently based on those thoughts. Their mothers, who may be turning over in their graves over the failure to act, would smile with pride instead.
The first reaction I had to this commentary is that it really makes no sense. The ideas presented here are as obsolete as the laws the writer is lobbying to be “enforced”.
Western society mandating what are and are not considered acceptable sexual practices, along with trying to stagnate and distort sexuality (especially by the Christian church) are directly responsible for what has led to the amount of sexual depravity taking place today. In addition most parents or guardians fail to discuss and educate children so they are prepared to act responsibly as they develop sexually.
Even the “history” being presented here (among other remarks) when the author says “that belongs really in the dark ages when women all went to their marriages innocent and virginal, to be raped on the wedding night by a man in a hurry to enjoy what he had long been denied” could be the case with some, but I would like to see the authors evidence to back up such a wild statement.
This is another nonsensical statement, “We need to treat each victim of a sexual offence as if she was the daughter of President Max Richards.” I could surmise the writer was trying to say by the victims being treated like the “presidents daughter” that would make them safer from becoming sexual crime victims. Even looking at the statement as stated, what exactly is the advantage of a victim of a sexual offense being treated as the presidents daughter, better medical care perhaps or a more urgent response to locate the perpetrator. The victim is still a victim.
This author must be taking her cue from the U.S. governments attitude about habeas corpus when she states “Why could not that suspected rapist been shackled to his bed, and to a long metal bar and chain when he went to the restroom?”
I do not know where the author gets her information about what goes on in the gentlemen’s clubs, titty bars and cat houses, but what about the idea that for the most part those involved in the activities taking place are there of their own accord and have their right to do so.
As far as the safety issue goes, Western society is skewed so yes poor people are victimized in all ways more often than any other element of society. Poor people also are the first to be considered as the perpetrators of criminal activities, and often are taken into custody, railroaded into false confessions and not allowed access to adequate legal representation or due process. The case of U.S. congressman from Florida Mark Foley and his predatory activities shows though, that sexual crimes are not exclusive to any age group, gender or social class of people and often go unreported and undetected.
Females of all ages are vulnerable to sexual crimes and predators within and outside the home, although violent sexual crimes are the most common instances reported by the media. For the most part, sexual crimes wherever they are committed go unreported, often because of fear on the part of the victims that they will not be believed or will be painted in a bad light as if they were asking for this type of treatment. The author failed to make a case that sensitivity training by police officers or how registering known sexual predators will alleviate any of these problems.
Although I agree that the brutality of rape is a heinous and hideous crime and that the so-called justice system is discriminatory when dealing with different people within the society, your article seems very far-fetched.
Firstly, I fail to follow your ‘logic’ when you state that,
Both males and females seek sexual stimulation by the afore-mentioned means so to single out males who do this to be prone to rape is quite ridiculous. Also, “sensible” people do seek titillation by viewing pornography, going to sex clubs etc. Your line of ‘reasoning’ is clearly unreasonable and unfounded.
Making such broad claims, especially when there is no evidence to back it up, is very irresponsible. Females of all walks of life can be victims of rape; some by their own husbands. What is a fact is that rape is a largely underreported crime by all victims.
For your information, some fathers/mothers are guilty of raping their children.
What if the monster lived in the house, would she have been safe there too?
You contradict yourself because according to you, the wife of the president could hardly ever be a victim of rape. After all, “Women are hardly raped at home who have a maid, a gardener and a security guard,” right?.
Why leave the decision making to males only? Females must also take partial responsibility for the attitudes common today.
As disturbing as the issue of rape is, creating a distorted picture of the situation would not help to deal with it.
I teach thireen year old boys. Rape is their favorite topic.They think its funny.
How do you explain this when one considers that they all have very limited English skills? Spanish is their native language. They watch television and learn all they need to know from there, and from magazines that are forbidden in schools. I point out that it would not be fiunny if it was their sister or their mother. Silence. Reality has hit home.
Regardless of how you react to the article, it is a fact- researched by me while working with an agency that deals in such matters, that men do not see rape as a really serious social problem. This I think is a function ofeducation,( not the rote learning sort we do in schools)
Everywhere in the Caribbean this is true. In North America it is a serious crime. Not in the islands, unless of course it happens to somebody important.
(How many prosecutions and convictions have their been for impregnating an underage child? Should the parents have to push for prosecution, or is that the business of the state and a reportable offense when brought to the attention of doctors or nurses in a hospital?)If any of the victims were somebody big’s daughter, she would be more protected, and even after victimhood, more effort would have been made to restrain the alleged culprit. A crimminal rapist murderer accused, but not convicted, should not be able to easily escape from his hospital bed. That is plain damn foolishness, that no amount of attacks against the logic or not of the piece, can explain away. Rape is not logical. Its a power play by a power hungry person against someone he regards as weak. It is a highly charged emotional issue.
Years ago when a law against raping one’s wife was discussed in Parliament, those advocating the law(THE NAR) were laughed at. “A man kyar rape he wife, what chupidness is this”.In 1984, I wrote a column for the Express called Rape Is No Laughing Matter after a series of visits to calypso tents, and being treated to rape jokes. The nature of the jokes may have changed slightly, but the casual attitude of a male dominated society to this problem remains a stain on our claim to civilized and developed status.
Have either respondent ever interviewed women who were raped to see their changed world view? One remembered the stench of the unwashed man. She said she bathed for days, threw out her bed linen, but could not get his smell out of her nostrils. She lived in Tacarigua, not the USA.
Whenever Trinis do not like something someone says, they blame it on America. Well, Trinidad is part of the Americas, you know. All of the imported fake lifestyle things come from there, but not the work ethic, nor the concern for the welfare of the vulnerable in society, nor the failure to implement a law that would allow people to know who their neighbour is, when that neighbour presents a clear and present danger to vulnerable people.
Kae and LPaul should be campaigning long and hard for stiffer penalties for rapists, for safer public transport, and for implementing the laws already on the books. I would also recommend that you keep a journal of the number of such cases that will come before the courts of the land between now and one year from today.
Ms. Edwards, I just have to say this was a wonderful article. I have similar views on the issue.
Kae and LPaul chose to pick apart to discredit your words. The point is, in this society the issue of rape is not dealt with as seriously and openly as it should be. The phenomenon of high profile cases (generally) being investigated as though the officer’s life depended on it and crimes committed against the small man/woman are treated as routine and low priority is what is being highlighted and what needs to be highlighted. All cases, including rape cases, need to be treated with the same urgency and compassion as the high profile ones. Anything else is a display of gross hypocracy. If anything happens to one of our Trinbagonian sisters the policeman should go after the perpetrator as if it was just that – his sister – who had been raped.
As a young Trinibagonian female, fear of rape has been in the back of my mind since I had the understanding of what it is. And I can speak from what I know among my female friends and family and I can safely say I am not alone with this concern. I, along with many of the females I know have been either fondled or sexually harrassed as children, teens or adults. a few have been all out raped, oftentimes by someone they know.
Women are raped left right and centre, fondled and harrassed every day on the streets, and I see nothing being done in the way of preventing future rapes – much less in providing education and support for those who have been raped.
It’s true many of the bad things from the US filter to our society. Why don’t the good things do the same. There can be an easily accessed registry of sexual predators. It will at least serve to inform and warn our women of who to look out for, where they need to be extra cautious and, if nothing else, deter other men when they don’t want their mug shot so openly displayed for these acts.
You said:
“Women are raped left right and centre, fondled and harrassed every day on the streets, and I see nothing being done in the way of preventing future rapes – much less in providing education and support for those who have been raped.”
Is this true? I reside in Trinidad and Tobago and this is not the reality as is evident by the reports of rape we get from the media and people on the streets. And if the matter is underreported then how did you come up with what is coming over as a gross exaggeration?
Also, where are the rebuttals to the important points that the two first responders made? Why make snide comments about them because of their critique, even to suggest to them the things they should be doing (by Linda E. Edwards) while not addressing the important points they raised?
In my view, that was not a well-written article by Ms. Linda Edwards and she offered nothing to substantiate some bold claims she made. Not because she is passionate about an issue means that her writings are above criticism.
Ah, well, here we go again, my attempt at clarifying what ought to be so clear. Now that the Express has called for the same law to be implemented, and now that a ten year old has been raped in Central by two grown men and a boy, perhaps those trying to detract from the issue will pause, and think.It could be their four year old sister next. May God protect her!
Women frequently do not bother to report fondling nor what seems like accidental touching, which is not. Who to report it to? Remember the case of a girl going a couple of years back to the San Fernando Police Station to report a sexual assualt, and her being taken to the back and raped by one of the officers on duty while her mother was in the front of the station? He was charged. Now if this could happen in the police station, where are women to go when their dignity has been violated? This is why rape may well be the most under-reported crime, everywhere in the world.
I did a T-group session on another Caribbean island some years back, in which I asked women, there were nineteen, to recall their first sexual experiences. The brutality they reported was stunning.I still have in my mind a clear picture of one, aged fourteen, going for a walk with her boyfriend, and he turning on her, jamming her up against a concrete water cistern, and forcing sex on her. She could not tell her mother. She had been warned about “that boy is no good”.
The concerns of women are often trivialized in societies like TnT, but so are the lives of the poor generally. Look at the murder rate, look at the hospital situation. You might as well keep your rape to yourself. Read on.
I know of a young girl in Couva some years back who went to the Couva Police Station to report that she had been raped. She had straw in her hair, was dishevelled looking, weeping and head hung diown. Few believed her, but she was allowed to sit on a bench in the station while they contacted the doctor at the Couva Health Center. He also had a private practice , and it was a while before he could see the girl. Meanwhile, the police officers(there were no women there) loudly speculated that she had given her boyfriend some, and now was afraid of being found out by her parents. The child never said a word. After about two hours, she asked to use the toilet. They said OK.She got up to go, and a flood of blood and clotted mucus slipped down her legs. The offficers were shocked and began shouting for help. That is when my friend, the late Asst. Commissioner of Police, Richardson A. Henry, who was in charge of Central at the time, got up and walked out of his office to see what the commotion was. It reduced this father of one daughter to tears.
I got that story from him, directly, told with tremendous shame aboutthe attitude of his men. There was no emphasis on sensitivity training for police officers them. Is there any now?
I have been a campaigner for women’s issues since that time. This is not something most of the society bothers about. The literate ones may think it would not happen to them, and when and if it does, their shame can prevent them seeking help.
This is a simple test that either LPaul or the other two can try. Get some female friends, say about ten, together to talk, and at some point when they are comfortable, ask them to close their eyes, and raise their hands if they have ever been fondled, grabbed or penetrated by someone whom they did not wish to have do that to them. See how many would raise their hands. Social workers know that on the average, three in every four women would raise their hands.
The evidence is there. All you have to do is open the gates where women could talk about it.
I hope all readers are too decent souls to try to access the police records from Couva some time back to see who that little girl was. Papers do not publish the names of victims partly to protect them from the jeers of insensitive others. RApe is not a laughing matter, but many do laugh and shu shu about the victim, sometimes within earshot. Then, there is that other Couva girl who tried reporting her father’s raping her to the police officers who were his drinking buddies. She committed suicide. This of course is not evidence of anything. Every serious researcher knows that annecdotal evidence is the same as old wives tales.
What a world!
I note for the record, that on this day, October 14th, 2006, The Guardian has joined the argument by pointing out that child sexual abuse has reached epidemic proportions in one area of North Trinidad. Are we still talking of my exaggerating things?
In response to Ayinde,
“I reside in Trinidad and Tobago and this is not the reality as is evident by the reports of rape we get from the media and people on the streets. And if the matter is underreported then how did you come up with what is coming over as a gross exaggeration?” Ayinde
Like I said in my comment, “I can speak from what I know among my female friends and family and I can safely say I am not alone with this concern”. I’m not trying to make up media reports. I am saying that a teen like myself some years ago travelling home in a maxi getting her breasts fondled by the big man sitting next to her – or like other women or girls I have spoken to getting raped by a man/ boyfriend/ family member – or the family member who grew up with the step-dad who took every chance he could get to touch her private parts… every day. Even walking through the streets getting grabbed at by drunk men as you walk past a bar (not even in or out of, just passing by on your way home on an evening).
You may not like to consider these facts because they are not reported in the papers – but the fact is I, and those I know who did not report, either knew the incident was not going to be taken seriously, were afraid they would not have been believed or that they would bring disgrace to their family, or were in some cases too young and uninformed to now what was really going on or that it should be reported and is not just a secret that makes one feel bad.
Please understand, I am not making things up or exaggerating. Be happy that you are blessed enough not to experience what many other women experience. However that does not give you any good reason to bring down those who speak out about the abuse some women in society go through. Just because you don’t experience it or hear about it doesn’t mean it does not happen.
“Why make snide comments about them because of their critique, even to suggest to them the things they should be doing (by Linda E. Edwards) while not addressing the important points they raised?” Ayinde.
I am not making snide comments. I am responding. I am posting an opinion based on my understanding and experience. I did not see the need to go into details to make clear the contrast in the opinions and approaches to the article. The mentioned individuals did choose to pick apart and discredit. I chose to affirm and encourage, because discussions on such touchy but socially important issues need to be encouraged. If you don’t like the article, that’s you. Do not try to discredit what I say because you don’t agree.
“In my view, that was not a well-written article by Ms. Linda Edwards and she offered nothing to substantiate some bold claims she made.” Ayinde.
I don’t know Ms. Edwards but I can see by the fact that she has responded to the comments shows that for those who require more information, facts or substantiation, she is making sure to give as much as she can. I like this. She is taking your responses seriously and providing what she can to help you understand the background and experience behind the article and the claims she makes in it.
Not to mention, I particularly like the experiment she suggested about gathering some women, asking them to indicate (with all eyes closed of course since its a source of embarrassment and pain for many) who has been fondled etc.. It’s a good experiment. If you don’t believe her, or me, you can try it. It’s just a suggestion for an experiment. There’s no need to take it as anyone telling you what you should do. It’s an experiment. Do it if you want to.
It is too bad that you interpreted what I wrote as gross exaggerations – but I did make a point to say, and I reiterate, I speak for myself and those I know about. This is why I am pleased with the article by Ms. Edwards. It touched a chord for me and I simply thought she should know this.
Thanks, Kelli A. Lets plant some seeds that would germinate into groups that meet to discuss this. It could be any roup anywhere. people need to keep talking about these issues.Since this piece was first written, a couple of women have been murdered by irate husbands, lovers. This needs to be part of the discussion too.
This is all true, my husband was born in Trinidad. After fifteen years of marriage, he attempted to have oral sex with my granddaughters. He will spend the rest of his life locked up, his family thought that I should have swept it under the rug and send him back to Trinidad. The family moral values are extremely low. I wish I would have know about this, I would have never married him!
“After fifteen years of marriage, he attempted to have oral sex with my granddaughters,…… his family thought that I should have swept it under the rug.”
The above quote is all that matters to me, for I have absolutely no concern for mimicking industrial countries phony middle class legal posturing ,that really serves no useful purposes apart from allowing criminals to get more creative and run underground due to the fact many are in essence punished twice by society for a particular crime.
What is needed instead is for parents to encourage their kids to report inappropriate behaviors towards them by any adults, then follow the lead of the courageous Ginger Rambajan and take the appropriate necessary criminal justice actions – irrespective of any culturally driven ostrocization that is certain to follow- as is the norm – within particular segments of our population even within far recesses of the more advanced, pristine quarters, aboard.
Let’s try to keep it real , shall we?
Ginger, I salute you. Since that piece was written thirtyone months ago, a number of children in Trinidad ahave been raped and murdered. In two cases, family members of the murderer, ho both ommitted suicide, knew that he “was not right in his head” but said nothing and allowed vulnerable little girls to be raped and murdered.Thank you for your courageous act. You hav e protected your grand-daughters with your intelligence and determination. I salute your courage,and urge that you gnore the remarks of his family. They should be ashamed of him trying to exploit little children.
This man was so sneaky and low, that he attempted to have sex with my granddaughters, since they were two & four years old. He frightened them and brought them presents, and sent them hush money! He claimed to be “A Man On Fire For The Lord”! He even preached in churches and South Africa. Please women in the USA “Don’t Marry A Man From
Trinidad! I am Blessed that my family still accepts me. I had him living like a King! If he had a problem, he should have been man enough to warn me or leave! These men are extremely selfish!
Now, Ginger, while I salute your courage, I must say I had three brothers, all deceased now, who would never have molested a child, nor will I hope, my two sons, nor my ex-husband. What kind of man a man becomes has nothing to do with his country of origin, but the values he grows up with.Ex- Slave societies provide many opportunities for the denigration of women. I was recently at a Distinguished Lecture featuring Maya Angelou at 80. She remembered being raped by an uncle when she was seven. Her family beat him to death, and she took the blame on herself and never spoke again until she was fifteen. Now Maya, as far as I know, has no Trinidadian relatives. The man in Austria who imprisoned his daughter and her children by him, for more than twenty years, had no Trinidad relatives.
We often blame a whole country for the actions of a few miscreants. Please do not write off the fifteen grandsons, and twenty great-grandsons of my father and mother. They are well raised young men. This is true for thousands of families other than mine.
Please do not diminish your contribution with faulty generalizations.
“This man was so sneaky and low, that he attempted to have sex with my granddaughters. He even preached in churches and South Africa.”
Thanks a lot for your very important clarifications Ginger. It certainly forces us to refine our perspectives, on this important topic as put forth by Ms. L. .